Everyone gets a funny hat here in…

Lunchlady Land!

Regardless of your political views or persuasions you are probably disturbed by how slanted political ads tend to be. Here’s a geeky look at political ads (sorry if it doesn’t fit the theme very well):

It’s true! Just like these people…

Of course, I’m also a Mac.

If you ever hear a French person mock or belittle the US public education system, be sure to point them to this link.

PistolWimp – French Game Show: What Circles the Earth?

In case you don’t speak or read French, a brief explanation follows:

This is the French equivalent of “Who Wants to be a Millionaire?”  The contestant is asked, which of the following orbits the earth:

A. The Moon    B. The Sun

C. Mars           D. Venus

The guy doesn’t know the answer, which would be funny by itself.  He then uses his lifeline to ask the audience.  It comes as no surprise that 0% answered Mars or Venus, but when 56% said “The Sun,” and only 44% answered “The Moon” it turns into pure comedy.

He goes with the audience’s answer and humiliates himself on TV.  It appeared as though the host of the show was trying to bite his lip or something because the guy’s answer made him look a fool.

I’m sorry, but you’re not allowed in my country any longer.

“Death to Yankees” senator loses US visa
A Bolivian senator, a close ally of President Evo Morales known for her raucous chanting of “Long live coca, Death to the Yankees!,” said on Wednesday the United States had canceled her entry visa.

Seriously, if you are a senator-level politician in your country can you honestly believe we’ll just blithely allow you to proclaim “death to Yankees,” not to mention advocating a crop which is illegal here, and still expect us to grant you a US visa?

Stupid.  But then again, perhaps she’s been drinking a bit too much of her vaunted coca tea.

You just can’t make this stuff up!

Orem Man Reports Marijuana Stolen

According to police reports, 18-year-old Kory C. Tippetts returned home Monday evening to discover that someone had broken into his house. Tippetts reported that a quarter-pound of marijuana was the only thing missing.

Tippetts told police he had an idea who might have stolen it. Tippetts explained to police that he had received a call earlier that day from 23-year-old Richard W. Hight. Hight wanted to buy some marijuana, but Tippetts couldn’t meet him to make the sale.

Officers checked Hight’s house, where they recovered six ounces of marijuana and arrested him for burglary, theft, and possession of marijuana in a drug-free-zone with the intent to distribute. He was booked into the Utah County jail.

With the stolen marijuana now in hand, the officers called Tippetts to come to the police station to identify the drugs. Tippetts came to the station, identified the drugs, and was then arrested and booked on drug related charges.

Emphasis added

Stupid is as stupid does.

“Gullible Ignoramus on board”

Telegraph | News | ‘Space cadets’ prepare for TV hoax blast-off

A new reality TV show is aiming to pull off the biggest hoax in TV history – by persuading a group of Britons that they have been blasted into space.

See, the first thing I would find fault with is the evidence of gravity. After this I would probably scare the kneecaps off of my “crewmates” by trying to open the airlock.

Anyway, this whole thing reminds me of a Far Side comic — the one with the “Ship of fools / Car of idiots,” only this case is probably a combination of both. If you wanted to pull this off you would only need to collect en masse all of those who were ever contestants on Jay Leno’s “Battle of the ‘Jay-Walk’ All-Stars.” It would work.

Ok, so maybe that’s a bit morbid, but you can’t deny there’s something about a story like this that makes you want to see what exactly the described scenario looks like:

FOXNews.com – U.S. & World – Python Tries to Eat Alligator, Explodes

Alligators have clashed with nonnative pythons before in Everglades National Park. But when a 6-foot gator tangled with a 13-foot python recently, the result wasn’t pretty.

Yes, the snake exploded. Reminds me of that bit in Galaxy Quest when the pig-lizard didn’t survive re-integration:

Taggart: The pig-lizard turned inside out?!

Thermian: And it exploded.

Is there a future for this sort of thing? When cock fighting is banned, will they turn to snake vs. gator fights?

It doesn’t bode well for an organized rally event when the crowd can’t be depended on to swallow or follow the diverse agendas of all speaking.

The Indepundit

JAMAL KANJ, a fiery Palestinian from a group called Al-Awda, takes the podium. “We Palestinians,” he begins, “have been subjected to GENOCIDE at the hands of the Israelis for generations.” He rants on. “In 1948, they forced us out of our homes, and today we must DRIVE THE JEWS FROM PALESTINE!”

Suddenly, a middle-aged man wearing a black “F the President” T-shirt rushes the stage, screaming at Kanj, “I’m TIRED of this CRAP! You people keep bringing this up! This is supposed to be an ANTI-WAR rally, not an ANTI-ISRAEL rally!”

Kanj yells back, into the microphone. Others in the crowd stand up and join in the shouting match.

The Arab-Israeli conflict has arrived in San Diego.

The linked post details how suddenly a third of the crowd departs soon after this and more follow suit later on. The protest and rally didn’t go quite as planned, it would seem.

This story is worth a few laughs, if only to see how the events seemed to play out as observed by one attendee.

I will not include the pictures because 1) This is just me quoting the story and, 2) It’s impolite to do so when someone else did all the work. In light of this, I include the text as a teaser so you’ll go and view these two pictures. It’s hysterical and embarrassing to those involved. I would feel like a complete and total tool, regardless of the actual nature of the events transpiring. So, without further ado, I give you the photos of the day:

lgf: How Phony Can They Get?

Here’s a touching scene, featuring Cindy Sheehan and the Reverend Al Sharpton, in front of crosses, looking solemn and sad.

(Picture 1 here)

Now let’s zoom out and see the media swarm around this manufactured event:

(Picture 2 here)

If you don’t click through to see these photos you are really missing out.

Jonathan Swift would be proud, I think.

TCS: Tech Central Station – Make San Francisco the Leftwing Paradise It Hopes to Be

The vote against the USS Iowa shows that San Francisco is being treated unfairly by the U.S. military. Our military defends the people of San Francisco even though the city’s elected leaders want nothing to do with the military. All Americans should be horrified that the good leftists of San Francisco must suffer the crushing moral burden of being protected by a force their leaders so despise. I therefore propose that the U.S. armed forces withdraw their protection of San Francisco.

Yes, this is pure snark. No, I don’t think he’s completely in earnest, but there’s definitely an element of reality and truth to this. Yes, I find myself agreeing with the author.

Well, sort of. This had me laughing pretty hard, though:

Cabbie’s Tip Led Cops to Couple

Wagers said the pair told him they were headed to an Amway convention and that he became suspicious because they didn’t act like Amway representatives.

“Amway people are all about Amway, and when they didn’t try any conversation further about it, that’s when I pretty much thought, ‘Well, they’re not with Amway; they’re doing something else.’”

But, he told reporters, “they gave me no cause for suspicion other than the Amway thing didn’t really stick.”

This is just too funny. I guess Amway reps have a reputation that just won’t go away.

Yes, the old adage still remains true: The truth really is stranger than fiction.

Sky News : Clinton Offered 40 Goats For Daughter

Former US president Bill Clinton has been offered 40 goats and 20 cows for his daughter by a love-struck African government official.

This will doubtless become fodder for Jay Leno and Dave Letterman and other late-night routines. I can’t help but be slightly amused, however.

This made me smile:

lgf: We Came, We Saw, We Shredded

By an earlier federal court ruling, the Veterans group that hosts Missouri’s Air Show was forced to allow the peace groups to hand out their literature and carry protest signs onto the tarmac of the event. The court ruled that protesters had the right to free speech. So, we provided some free speech of our own, by the name of Operation Simply Shred.

A simple concept, legal, moral, and deliciously humorous – Operation Simply Shred provided a polite, free and immediate shredding service for any unwanted political literature or flyer that an Air Show or parade attendee did not care to keep any longer. Small, powerful battery operated shredders in the hands of polite and helpful volunteers allowed any citizen to exercise their own First Amendment right to shred any flyer or propaganda piece handed to them by a “peace at any price” protestor just seconds after they received it. And it was environmentally friendly to boot.

I am all about this sort of free speech! I hope more people take this sort of initiative at other events. It’s not really free speech if those with an opposing view are unable to express it. Happily, these enterprising individuals have found a way to do so.